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March 07, 2005
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War hero, moonshine bootlegger, crustacean. Bubba the Lobster was all these things and more... |
Gigantic sea critter dies
PITTSBURGH, Pennsylvania (Based on a true story) -- The seafood world last week mourned the death of a 22-pound lobster named Bubba, who may have been up to 100 years old.
One report described Bubba as "a gigantic lobster that may have survived two world wars and Prohibition" but left it for us to detail this sea creature's long and fascinating life.
Bubba first enlisted in 1919 and was decorated with a Gold Bib for his actions at the Battle of Bayside Lagoon, where his sharp claws skewered fifteen enemy crabs. After the war Bubba ran a popular Boston nightclub, the Lucky Chowdah, and smuggled casks of whiskey across the ocean floor from Newfoundland. Called back into service during World War II, Bubba's underwater scampering for the US Navy proved invaluable in targeting German U-boats off the coast of New England.
Lobsters of Bubba's size are rare, because most lobsters are caught and eaten when they are just a few years old. "Under ideal conditions, lobsters are immortal. They just keep getting bigger and more delicious every year," said spokeswoman Rhonda Carp of the Pittsburgh Zoo and PPG Aquarium, where Bubba will be examined for science. The zoo plans to hold a Bisque Day celebration and fundraiser dinner next week in Bubba's honor.
Disclaimer: This story probably isn't true, names have been changed, and any quotes are most likely made up.
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